Friday, April 30, 2010

First Post... downs and ups.

Well, this is my first post on what is hopefully a frequently updated weight LOSS blog. After years of ups and downs in dieting and exercise, I feel like I'm at point break. I have made a new plan, have new motivation, and as of right now I'm creating a new mode of accountability.

I just weighed in after week 3 of diet and exercise. How did I do?

Gain of 2lbs. Not at all what I was hoping for. Week 1 was a loss of eight, week 2 I achieved a loss of 2lbs, now a gain of 2lbs.

I weighed in April 9, 2010 at 320 lbs. It's not the heaviest I've been, but it's getting close. Those who know me might be surprised by that number. I don't usually let it slow me down. For those of you who wonder how it feels to be that heavy, I'll describe it briefly.

It hurts. After working 12 hour shifts, my knees, hips, ankles, and feet hurt. I'm tired. There's many days that I feel exhausted just from doing normal activities. I'm hungry, I'm stressed, I'm self-concious, I'm wishing that I had more self-control. I feel bad, and that in itself is a self-perpetuating feeling.

When I'm sad or stressed, I eat. When I'm celebrating, gathering, meeting, or socializing, I eat. I can describe every holiday according to food. I love to cook, and am a pretty good cook. Food tastes good, and it allows me to travel across the world without leaving my kitchen. I eat when I relax, when I study, when I wake up, and before I go to sleep. I love food.

I've been on a lot of diets. I don't think I could even list all of them (becuase I can't remember them). Fad diets and extreme diets, all kinds of diets have played on the stage of my life.

But all this is no more. I've developed a new strategy, and a new philosophy. I'll share it with you over the next few weeks. I hope that maybe you can pick up some things that will help. For now, I'll just say that I am excited and confident this time around.